Outstanding Performance

This is a big surprise. Outstandig performance. Pity shes such a SHOCKING judge. And a cop out!!! Grow some balls girl, you made a big mistake sending that little girl home.

Funny

Stupidity

Stupidity - further proof

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

1. On Sears hairdryer:
"Do not use while sleeping."
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair)

2. On a bag of Fritos:
"You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."
(Evidently, the shoplifter special)

3. On a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(And that would be how. . . ?)

On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestions: Defrost."
(But it's "just" a suggestion)

5. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box):
"Do not turn upside down."
(Oops, too late!)

6. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating."
(As night follows the day . . . .)

7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body."
(But wouldn't this save even more time?)

8. On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

9. On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(One would hope)

10. On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(As opposed to what?)

11. On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use."
(I gotta admit, I'm curious.)

12. On Sainsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: Contains nuts."
(NEWS FLASH)

13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: Fly Delta.)

14. On a child's Superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company, I blame parents for this one.)

15. On a Swedish chain saw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Was there a chance of this happening somewhere?... Good grief)

16. On a bottle of Palmolive Dishwashing liquid:
"Do not use on food."
(Hey, Mom, we're out of syrup! It's OK honey just grab the Palmolive!)

17. On a tube of Crest Toothpaste:
"If swallowed contact poison control."
(Oh please have you ever heard about someone dying from swallowing a
little toothpaste?)

18. On a bottle of ALL laundry detergent: "Remove clothing before
distributing in washing machine."
(Hey no more swimming in the washing machine kids)

AB Fab Returns

Being made at the moment are three new episodes of Absolutely Fabulous and all the core cast are returning. Cant wait.

yet another royal wedding

This past weekend saw royalt assemble in Germany for Kaiser Whilhelms great grandson's wedding. Prince Georg Friedrich of Prussia and Princess Sophie of Isenburg married in  Potsdam surrounded by many eurpoean aristocrats. Broadcast live on german televisiob it didnt quite have the same appeal as that of th Duke and Duchess of Cambridge but more than would have been expected in this democratically run country

Movies this week

have watched two outstanding movies this week. One Christopher and his kind starring the new Doctor who Matt Smith and A Single Man starring Colin Firth. Both outstanding pieces. interesting that so mant english playing american s and americans playing English, rather bizarre really. I would recommend these to anyone althogh probably not everyones cup of tea.

Its the year of the royal wedding

Last week saw the wedding of Prince Rachid of Jordan. Hes the little man in the photo. His bride Princess Zina is the tall one in the white Frock. Attended by many other royals including Prince Philip, Rachid is the cousin of King Abdullah. The bride is apparently an ace at table tennis...WOWEE!!!!

Another Royal wedding

Today saw another royal wedding, that of Zara Phillips and Mike Tindall. Slightly more a family occasion this time a little more low key that that of the Duke and Duckess of Cambridge.

Fashion verdict: In general a big fail.

The brides dress was plain and she looked lovely BUT it look ed liked thay had run out of material and added an extra bit to the bottom. And not sewn well either.

Katherine, Duchess of Cambridge even failed. Her hat was horrid!!!!

Beatrice and Eugenie continue to show us they have inherited their mothers style or lack of it.

The only royal that looked vaguely nice was the Duchess of Wessex. 8 points to you Sophie.

All in all an anti climax!!!

Facing Old age

As I get older I am finding myself suffering fools less. I had a discussion this past weekend about being nice to someone I dislike for no reason other than to be nice. Life is too short for me to spend time going to functions with people I dont particularly get on with, it just makes for a completely unpleasant evening. So rather than feeling like a fake I have decided I shall no longer go out of my way to be overly pleasant to people I cant abide. There is too much fakeness in this world already without me adding to it. I know I sound like a particularly unpleasant character but take me as you find me.

What I watched this week

So now that i dont have theatre every night to go to I have taken up watching even more television than I usually do. So here is my take on what I watched.

Okay I can only really bear to watch one episode of Shortland Street a week. The acting in general seems to be going form bad to worse. And its so intriguing how two characters who used to be gay are suddenly straight again. Its time the scriptwriters perhaps looked at some of the Uk soaps for inspiration.

What has happened to Ellen. She seems to have disappeared in favour of Masterchef Australia. You know what i dont give a shit about Masterchef Australia but it seems Television channels have an issue with talk shows. The View was taken off Vibe much to my disgust and now Ellen has disappeared. Thank God for Graham Norton i say.

Friday I watched Wedding House. Now this was of interest to me because of the industry I work in but really not a particularly enlightening programme.

I love Miranda on Friday nights. its a bit off the wall but bloody funny.

Loving The story of Costume Drama over on lifestyle. Fantastic insight into the great costume dramas from England. Well worth a look.

And this weeks highlight was definitely the wedding of Prince Albert of Monaco. Absolutely great coverage so much better than the brits did for Kate and William which was dissapointing as the british usually do these things so well.

Also highly recommend The Choir on UKTV. Outstanding doco.

A beautiful ceremony

here is a fifteen minute highlight package of the Monanco Royal wedding. Truly beautiful...Very musical...so much more romantic than the very staid wedding of Prince William. Even with it all being in french makes if kind of lovely. And I say poppycock to those who say she looks miserable. I would imagine it is a lot of pressure with all the worlds eyes on you. If you notice everyone is fanning themselves it must have been unbelievable hot. Watch and enjoy.

Guess what Ill be watching this weekend

Yes its time for another royal wedding and 'Ill be watching it. However I do wish these royals would marry at a rerasonable hour. 3am tomorrow morning for the civil ceremony and 3am on Sunday morning for the religious service.

My best wishes go to his serene highness Prince Albert of Monaco and Charlene Whitstock on the celebrations this weekend.

There are huge rumours flying around that Charlene tried to run away and was found at the airport by armed palace police...a little over the top I think. So we shall see tomorrow if its all go.

Proud of what we achieved

So havent blogged very much for the past couple of weeks. Have been slighly preoccupied with the production of The Mikado. Gilbert and Sullivan may be very boring to some but i think we managed to turn a few people. Very proud of the cast and crew for doing an excellent job. Here are some of the pics of the show. Thanks to Harold, Riette and Anna for making this a wonderful team effort. Thanks also to those who came to see it. Those who didnt, well you missed a treat.

So he can sing...and DANCE

Here is Danielle Radcliffe at the Tonys.Hes pretty damn good.

Talented little Bugger

Tony results

So the book of Mormon has scooped the Tony Awards.

Here are the winners

• Best Musical: Book of Mormon
• Best Play: War Horse
• Best Musical Revival: Anything Goes
• Best Play Revival: The Normal Heart
• Best Featured Actress in a Play: Ellen Barkin, The Normal Heart
• Best Featured Actor in a Play: John Benjamin Hickey, The Normal Heart
• Best Actress in a Play: Frances McDormand, Good People
• Best Actor in a Play: Mark Rylance, Jerusalem
• Best Actress in a Musical: Sutton Foster, Anything Goes
• Best Actor in a Musical: Norbert Leo Butz, Catch Me If You Can
• Best Featured Actress in a Musical: Nikki M. James, The Book of Mormon
• Best Featured Actor in a Musical: John Larroquette, How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying
• Best Choreography: Anything Goes
• Best Direction of a Play: Marianne Elliott and Tom Morris, War Horse
• Best Direction of a Musical: Casey Nicholaw and Trey Parker, The Book of Mormon
• Best Book of a Musical: The Book of Mormon
• Best Orchestrations: The Book of Mormon
• Best Original Score: The Book of Mormon
• Best Scenic Design of a Play: War Horse
• Best Lighting Design of a Play: War Horse
• Best Sound Design of a Play: War Horse
• Best Sound Design of a Musical: The Book of Mormon
• Best Lighting Design of a Musical: The Book of Mormon
• Best Costume Design of a Musical: Priscilla Queen of the Desert
• Best Costume Design of a Play: The Importance of Being Earnest

Looking every bit the Princess

The Duchess of Cambridge made a public appearance at the Races with other members of the Royal family. Have to say she really looks very much a royal princess. Even Beatrice and Eugenie were rather subdued in comparison to recent appearances.

Oops...that was a bit of a balls up!

Poor Pres Obama...someone starrted the national anthem at the wrong time I THINK.
Now the video says the queen humiliated Obama but its just a minor hiccup. i dont think hes been humiliated

sad

One of my fav aussie actors has passed away. From Muriels Wedding and Priscilla truly an icon. RIP Bill Hunter

Say what you like

75350 pounds is what the bidding stands up with still a day of bidding to go. all going to charity..Good for her

Kristen Chenoweth singing Taylor the Latte Boy

I love this woman and had to share this

This is classic!

Lisa Lampanelli (okay I hear some of you saying who but if you watch the comedy Channels roasts, shes the one that apparently likes black men) is appearing in the town of Topeka Kansas. So what you say. Well Topeka is the Home of the Westboro Baptist Church ,the mongrels that picket servicemens funerals and who were going to picket Liz Taylors funeral because they called her a whore and she supported gays. Well Lisa Lampanelli is going to give $1000 to a gay charity for every westboro baptist moron that turns up to picket her show. And shes doing it in their name. This is genius!